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April 13, 2010
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Certificates of Quackery by toenolla Certificates of Quackery by toenolla
A certificate I created to go with the products on this Etsy page, which offers $50 slips of paper tied to sticks, and $15 half sticks of white chalk with pentacles drawn on. It's my reaction to the almost unfathomable landslide of purportedly magical crap you can buy on the Internet.

Each of the products on the page feature these two pictures, which means the word "QUACKERY" is repeated on each entry several times.

Even though it was an afterthought, I spent more time on this card than on any other part of the project, because I forced myself to do very simple, non-detail oriented work on the rest, for the sake of this project's thesis. If you're super curious, you can read my artist statement here.
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:iconaurakiss:
AuraKiss Featured By Owner May 29, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I thought this was maybe your version of a Certificate of Authenticity (COA) a paper that has gone crazy all over the art circles. Basically that is something that lists the supplies, hours, artist name and date of creation and the trust that the artist will never create another piece exactly like the one that the buyer holds the certificate for. Uhh sorry you probably already know what that is..

Anyway I think you did a great job! it looks all realistic for such a joke.
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:icontoenolla:
toenolla Featured By Owner May 29, 2010  Professional General Artist
Oh wow...I didn't know that was such a big deal among for realsies artists. The only things that I know of that always come with COAs are those schlocky collectible plates and terrible statuettes they sell on late night TV.

I love packing in certificates with my work, but they're almost always jokes. What are you supposed to do with a certificate of authenticity? Put it in your safety deposit box, for the benefit of your heirs? Is it printed on security paper to prevent forgery?

I'd rather have a piece of paper certifying that I just bought a piece of crap. At least it'd be honest.
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:iconaurakiss:
AuraKiss Featured By Owner May 29, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Well the ones I have seen have security paper and this little gold seal thing. I know there are a couple sculpture people that sell on ebay with a COA and a COA number on the sculpture. I have watched some of the auctions out of curiosity the one last Christmas about sold for over a grand so I suppose a COA is going to register the amount paid for it. It might be a security thing for the buyer. I mean if you buy this sculpture and pay a thousand for it maybe you want to list it on your home-owners insurance.

I am still in the process of deciding if I want to do something like a COA for some of my larger projects.

I just thought your idea was cute, kind of a self promotion thing for a steam-punk artisan.
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:icontoenolla:
toenolla Featured By Owner May 29, 2010  Professional General Artist
Hah! Well that's a lot more involved than I imagined. Might be something to look into if I ever do anything serious.

The whole idea of this product having value is the joke - I mean, have you even seen my product? I am in fact certifying that it's inauthentic. That's not even my real signature on there - it says "Chester Elegante."

Of course, as soon as you put a certificate with something, I think that changes the work on a fundamental level, even if the certificate certifies it as a fake. The certificate represents absolute knowledge of the work, and that's somehow valuable when you make it tangible by printing it out. I find that fascinating.

Thanks for your kind remarks. Didn't mean to get into a whole philosophical thing but...oops, I guess. XD
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:iconaurakiss:
AuraKiss Featured By Owner May 29, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Actually I enjoyed it. Makes me feel like there are real people behind the things we see.
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:iconstarrydance:
Starrydance Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2010
I keep wandering by to see if youve made a sale.

Because of course, youll make more money with this than I can with my art. Just for the lulz! =D
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:icontoenolla:
toenolla Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2010  Professional General Artist
Hah, I doubt it. These are intended to be internet shelf candy. If anyone buys one (despite disclaimers), I will be extremely appreciative, though.
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